“I had it all wrong. I was planning for my life and my career externally, not internally.” Mary Brown is a business designer and her ability to help others design their work-life is based on her own success*. She says when she first started out, she had spreadsheets and plans for what would happen with her career and life growth. If she had to give advice to her younger self from today’s vantage point however, she would tell herself to plan internally. Life may not happen as you expect externally, but there will be a red thread and you need to use your own internal compass to guide you. Plan for who you are and who you want to be and the rest will fall into place.
What are Mary’s other recommendations?
- Embrace the mundane.
Mary says that the mundane is all part of the process. While she has a job she loves, she also knows that every job includes elements that are not her favorite. “It’s like dusting the house,” she says, “It’s all part of the process.” Enjoy your work and the fun parts of your job or career, but know there will always be things you have to do that you don’t prefer. Stick with the job anyway. Those less-preferred parts of work are simply part of the process. - Do the right things today, in order to prepare for tomorrow.
“You know within the first 90 days whether a job is the right one,” Mary says. But put your best into it and enjoy it while you’re there. You’ll transition to the next step, but make the best of situations even when they’re not your final goal. “No one wants to work with someone who doesn’t like what they’re doing,” she says. Her trick? Always seek out how you can make the best contribution. She says that at the times she has landed in a job that wasn’t the perfect fit, it’s been a lesson learned so she can be attuned to make a better choice the next time. And in the meantime, she figures out how to do her best while she’s there. - Maintain your character despite the influx.
There is a deluge of information and expectation that hits all of us every day. Especially for young people who are still building their character and figuring out who they are, this flood of information can be overwhelming and demanding. Be true to yourself and ensure that you’re managing the expectations coming at you, and making your own choices, not the choices of others. - Mirror into others.
Mary is most driven by a desire to learn, to see people achieving success, and to help people access new thinking. When she uses the intriguing terminology of ‘mirroring into others’ she means to make a connection and help them. She wants to add to their journey without being disruptive. We can achieve more in terms of our own life satisfaction by authentically helping others. - Let go.
Mary talks about the need to let go. Sometimes people have such passion that they want to have their hands in everything. This is especially true of women entrepreneurs who have grown their own businesses from the very beginning. An important part of learning and growth is being able to let go and share the opportunity for contribution with others. By involving others, we provide the opportunity for them to feel a sense of ownership and accomplishment and we create space for our own work-life integration.
Mary frames work-life integration as seamlessness. When she is successfully integrating work and life, things are seamless and she flows between her work, her learning, and time for herself. She works really hard not to be overwhelmed. Most of the time it works because she “keeps things in balance”, and this is how she makes her greatest contribution!
*Mary works for GROW (Grand Rapids Opportunities for Women) as well as leeAlexander Consulting. She also teaches for Grand Rapids Community College. In her spare time (!) she is working on her doctorate through Pepperdine University.
Would you like to tell your story? If so, let me know by emailing me at tbrower108@gmail.com. Why? One of the foundations of Bringing Work to Life is abundance: the idea that it is possible to find fulfillment, have it all, and avoid the trade-offs between work and life. After all, work and life aren’t separate things to be placed in containers, but part of an integrated whole of a satisfying life. Another foundation of Bringing Work to Life is the idea of multiple right answers. As we’re all seeking ways to bring work to life – and bring life to work – we can learn from each other’s unique solutions and stories. I’d love to learn about your story!